i finally got my piece of the pie

The saga is over, the house is officially ours!! Monday morning, we were up in the wee hours and hit the road for our walk-through that was supposed to happen at 8:30am. We met our agent at the house right on time only to find a van and an SUV in the driveway, and 3 guys still clearing things out. Talk about waiting ’til the last-minute. We walked into the house and the crazy lady’s son quickly ushered us out, saying that his mom didn’t want us in the house unless she was there and she wasn’t going to be coming for another hour and a half. Ummm, okay, that wasn’t going to work, so we found the one sane person in the family and asked for a favor: crazy’s husband called her up and convinced her to let us in.

Upon entering, we were all very pleasantly surprised by how little crap was left in the house! And the kitchen cabinets were still there! The place was dirty but if that was the least of our worries, we figured we were in great shape considering what could have been. With smiles on our faces, we left to go get some breakfast at Walker Bros. and figure out the rest of the day. First on the list was finding a locksmith, but we quickly discovered that reception in the restaurant was horrible so we ate, then found this beautiful park where Scott could make phone calls and I could walk through the wild flowers and dodge dragonflies. I can’t wait to go back there and explore the grounds and have a picnic, or lay out on a soft blanket with a good book. Welcome to Lake Glenview:

Once Scott had found a locksmith, I didn’t want to leave but we had to hit the road again. We took a quick trip to Home Depot and realized how dangerous that store is now; we saw things we never would have considered buying in the past without a house to do things to. From there, we went to the seller’s attorney’s office for the closing and Crazy and her husband were already there. The closing took about 45 minutes but we ended up sitting there for an extra 2 1/2 hours waiting for Bank of America to give wire instructions for the money we were getting back. We decided to leave without the money so we could meet up with the locksmith at our new house, yippee! and the closing agent assured us she’d call when the money came in. Scott’s mom and aunt, and my sister and her boyfriend came out to see the house and while walking around a few more times, we noticed a few, er, hiccups…

1. In the time between the walk through and the closing, she replaced every single light bulb with 25 watt bulbs. I would have thought my eyes were playing tricks on me if it weren’t for the evidence she left of 25 lightbulb sleeves on the counter. Uggh.

2. She left us the ‘spare fridge’ in the lower level and it’s full of NyQuil bottles and bags of whole frozen fish that I swear were staring at me when I opened the freezer.

3. She left 10 bird feeders hanging on the part of the fence she didn’t take, one of which is full of bees. And that one just so happens to be next to the door of the shed.

4. There’s a creepy gnome in the tree in the backyard. The tree has literally grown around him. I’ve named him Chuck and he’s staying.

5. She took a light fixture in the living room. At the closing she was all, “I took the light. I’m sure you saw, but you don’t care, right? It wasn’t worth anything but I wanted it so I took it.” I thought it was ugly and would have replace it anyway, but still.

6. She left every window unlocked and cracked open just a hair. Sneaky little bastard.

7. And the best part is that we ran into her at ABT when we were buying our appliances and she told us she had just been at the house to check the mailbox and that she’d be back everyday to check the mail even though she’s had her mail forwarded. Can you say federal offense and restraining order??

Anywho, the house is ours and I haven’t actually seen her over there yet so I’m a happy camper! I headed over there tonight with my sister to start painting – I have to get the kitchen finished before the appliances arrive on Saturday, but alas we didn’t actually get any painting done. We did, however, buy the paint and supplies, and we managed to change all the light bulbs so we made some progress. Painting will commence Friday evening.

Until then…



Filed under home, ridiculousness

13 responses to “i finally got my piece of the pie

  1. bohemianbailie

    Congratulations!! I work in property management and one time on a vacation rental the people stayed a week then left with all the lightbulbs!! Some people are just crazy!

    • What is it about lightbulbs?? It wasn’t terribly expensive to buy all new ones, so I’m not sure I see the value in them taking them?!?!? I guess some people will take anything that isn’t nailed down.

  2. When we bought our house, the previous owner was trying to sledgehammer out a custom built desk that was attatched to the wall! That was one of the reasons I love the house! Our realtor caught him and called him out on it because anything attatched to the wall was supposed to stay. Then they wanted to take these two sets of drawers that were holding the desk up. I was all stressed out about finding drawers that would be the same height. When I got the keys, their realtor says “I have a surprise for you” and showed me the office. The desk and the drawers were there. Apparently everything was so glued in they couldn’t get anything apart. Gee thanks, you gave me what I was supposed to get anyway!

    • Seriously? It’s called a built-in for a reason! That’s how I felt when I saw the kitchen cabinets and bathroom vanities and toilets still there. It’s like, thanks a ton for not really doing me a favor.

  3. Em

    People are nuts!! I read those 7 points to my husband and he was like WHAT?? Hopefully that was the last you’ll see of her. Now you can focus on getting YOUR house move-in ready. Congrats!!

    • Lots of making it our own this weekend! I can’t wait ’til we get all of our stuff in and actually start living there, that’s when it’ll really feel like mine 🙂

  4. emh

    Hi Jaime! I’ve been a lurker for quite awhile, and I just love hearing about your house adventures. I’m a new homeowner as well, and it’s just so much fun for me to read about other people’s searches and experiences. We bought a foreclosure so we didn’t have to deal with a seller but boy – did you get a winner! Can’t wait to keep reading!!

    • Ah, so yours was vacant, lucky pants! Although just think of the fun adventures you could have experienced with a lunatic seller. You’re missing out. Not really.

      • emh

        haha it might have been vacant but we were left some gifts from squatters. like pee-filled old rugs, a whole fridge filled with food (no electricity)… some random posters… i did find an old journal which is exciting and filled with writing from a middle school who hated her mother’s guts and did a lot of drugs. haha.

        it’s nice though that the house has you to love it as a nice, sane couple! 🙂

  5. she is certified crazy.
    You guys have been more patient that I would have been though!
    Looking forward to see you make this house your own!

  6. Jane

    Our neighbor has been opening our mail box for a few months– one of the letters we got was opened up on Monday, so we left a note in there saying that we have her on tape. We said we’d press charges if she did it again. A huge bluff, but the mailbox isn’t opened anymore without us or the mail girl opening it. I’m hoping she will again so that we can get a restraining order on her. I don’t want her within 500 feet of my property. Best of luck to you getting rid of the stalker!

  7. that’s whack. i almost feel badly for her except that i’m pissed off on your behalf. well, she’s gone (crossing fingers)! more importantly, congratulations!

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