can i get a sticker?

Hi there.

So I’ve been a little absent lately which is funny considering a lot of the friends whose blogs I follow are doing something I would never be able to commit to – it’s a minor form of torture called NaBloPoMoSomeThingOrOther where one writes a blog post every day during the month of November. If I had signed myself up for that it would have made a liar out of me, plain and simple, and no one likes a liar.

Anywho, let me tell you about the ridiculousness I’ve been dealing with for the last few days….

My license plate sticker expires in 3 weeks and normally I would have gotten a renewal notice in the mail by now. Now because my car registration has my old city address on it, I wouldn’t be surprised if it was originally sent there; however, considering I had my mail forwarded when I moved you would think that it, especially being a government issued document, would have shown up at my house, but no, that would be too easy. So last week I went to the DMV to 1. finally change my address on my driver’s license and 2. get my plate sticker (apparently you can walk in, pay for it, and leave with it. Ahem, usually).

Now I have no idea how the Department of Motor Vehicles works in any state other than IL, but here you walk in, tell them what you’re there for, get a number like at the deli counter at the grocery store, and sit and wait until your number is called. And because I was there for 2 different things, lucky me got 2 different numbers.

So I sit.

And I wait.

And finally I get called up to the most friendly, pleasant woman I have ever encountered at the DMV. She complimented me on my hair and my engagement ring and I wanted to ask if I could be her best friend right there and then. Instead she changed my address in the system, made me take the little eye test where you press your forehead against a nasty black bar to turn the machine on, then you read line 5 and tell her where you see the lights flashing – left side, right side, or both (hint: it’s always both). She gives me a paper and tells me to sit back down and wait until my second number is called.

So I sit.

And I wait.

And finally I get called again and go up to another counter to a man, not as complimentary but just as pleasant, and he’s all set to tell me how much to make the check out for and then he says the dreaded words. “Well, it seems we have a problem here.” No one likes hearing those words. Turns out I have to get my car emissions tested before I can get my sticker. Defeated, I went to the cashier to pay for my change of address where I was informed that my new BFF forgot to write down the results of my eye test so lucky me got to take it again.

Oh, emissions testing….yeah, that’s another IL thing that I know not all of you have to go through out there in bloggo land. Once in a while, us Illinoisans have to go to a cute little place where you pull into a garage, turn your car off, tell them how many miles you have, then go sit in a tiny little room that looks like a toll booth that’s literally 2 feet away from your car for 3 minutes or so…

(those are the ‘waiting rooms’ and the cars pull up in between them)

…until they open the door and tell you to get back into your car. They hand you a slip of paper that hopefully says PASS and you’re good to go. Oh, and your check engine light can NOT be on or it’s an instant fail.

Mine’s on.

I need an O2 sensor replaced and I’ve known this for eh, 6 months now? But guess what…when my check engine light came on, I went to Car-X and the fucker quoted me $450. Funny considering the part should be somewhere in the $150 range and it’s a matter of unplugging the old one and plugging in the new one. And when I laughed at the guy and drove away, he called me later and left me a voicemail:

“Uh, hi, this is Dick from Car-X. So, uh, turns out we can take care of your car for $250. Thanks.”

Sorry, that one just left a really bad taste in my mouth and I chose to deny the fact that my check engine light was on. And up until now I’ve been denying it so well! Oh, and backing up a bit, one wouldn’t think I’d have to have my car emissions tested yet considering I bought it a year ago, but no, Jaime learned something new this week. Any car that is 4 years old has to be tested every 2 years starting with the year it turns 4. My car is an ’06. Damn.

So anywho, long story short, I took my car this morning to a place down the street that charged me a measly $220 (ok, it hurt but not as bad as the Car-X rip-off would have), had my car ready in a few hours, and my check engine light is finally not staring me in the face. So from there I went straight to the emissions testing place.

I pulled up in the garage. I told him my mileage. I took 2 steps to my left and sat in the waiting room. 3 minutes later he told me to get back in my car, so I did. Then he handed me my paper.I know you can pass, I know you can fail. I didn’t know you could be:

Jaime learned something else new today. Yep, the Illinois Air Team rejected me. Turns out the computer in my car needs to reset since I literally JUST had work done, so I have to drive around for a day or 2 then go back. And since they’re closed tomorrow for Veteran’s Day, Friday will be the day. Then once I’m no longer deemed a reject to the Secretary of State, I get to go back to the DMV, get a number, sit, wait, pay $78, and get my fucking sticker. Absolutely ridiculous.

Oh, and another reason I’ve been a little absent is because I’ve been writing secret blog posts that I haven’t published yet about how I’m pregnant.




Filed under pregnancy, pregnant, ridiculous, ridiculousness

27 responses to “can i get a sticker?

  1. Hannah

    My first car was about 15 years old and should have NEVER passed the Wisconsin admissions test. My mom used to tell me to wear a short skirt and be very nice. It worked every year.

    Thankfully, I 1) got a new car when I moved to Florida and 2) no emissions testing in Florida!!!

    • Haha, I love your mom’s advice! Too bad I’ll never ever wear a short skirt to work when I normally take my car to get tested, so unless the guy finds my black ratty pants sexy I don’t think it’d work for me 😦

  2. ME TOO!!!!!!! 🙂 Congratulations!! I haven’t put anything up on my blog yet because I’m not quite 12 weeks and we are waiting for that ultrasound before telling the world (due to past miscarriages.) For some reason, I was totally wondering if you were! Yay, now I can follow your blog through both our pregnancies! Wow, that’s a lot of exclamation points.

    • I think!!! moments like thes!e deserve a!s many !exclamation! points as will fit!! Congrats to you, too and I’m excited to have a pregnant buddy!!! I’m not quite 12 weeks either (just started week 11) but I couldn’t wait any longer, I would have told the world the day I found out if Scott would have been ok with it!

  3. Jane

    Sorry about your car sticker hassle. That’s why firearms were invented, along with that they were good to kill trespassers with.

    I honestly had to pick my jaw up off the ground because I’ve been betting against my inner self as to when you would get pregnant, but now that inner me has won the bet, and you will have a baby in around 9-ish months, I owe me Starbucks.

    Out of curiosity, does morning sickness suck, or are you lucky enough to be able to skip the puking daily? Just curiosity.

    • Bahaha, Jane, I was actually most excited about your reaction since you guessed it a few weeks ago! When you did, I had to pick MY jaw off the floor cause you were so right. And actually no puking, praise the Lord!!!!!!!!!! I’ve had a few waves of nausea but they’re less food related and more old-lady-perfume-in-the-grocery-store-check-out-lane-where-I’m-trapped related.

  4. WHOA! Congrats!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  5. Sarah

    WOW, congratulations!!!!! Your announcement is so funny…I love how simple.
    Congrats to you and your husband.

  6. Jen

    I totally know how you felt at the DMV – the wonderful state of Virginia has the same protocol where you get a number at the deli but we don’t have an emission station that you have (I’m in the ‘country’ not in the city where I used to live -where you have to get it done every other year)

    and..CONGRATS! So freakin excited!!

    • The best is when they call B213 and you’re H331 and you’re all, “ummmmm” until you realize that they’re calling numbers that start with B, H, M and C all at the same time. I always want to yell out, “BINGO!” when I finally get called.

  7. Oh Jaime! I’m so excited for you guys!! And holy shit I had no idea about the pain in the ass it is to handle all that car stuff in Illinois. I have a hard enough time keeping up with inspections and registration.

  8. you crack me up. last sentence of this post! now that you’ve announced here though, I can finally move you to my Pregnancy & Parenting section! YAY! 🙂

  9. Jen

    How exciting!! Congratulations

  10. yay! you are too funny! congrats to you both!

  11. Deanna

    Congratulations!!!!! So happy for you guys!

  12. Yay yay yay yay! I am seriously so excited for you guys. Can’t wait to follow along with little Nachito/a!
    Also the pain in the butt with the DMV is exaaaactly the same as the MVA here in Maryland, it sounds like -right down to the sketchy glass cubes you sit in for the emissions tests 🙂 Hope you get your PASS sticker soon!

  13. Barry

    How ironic that the guy at CarX was named… ‘DICK’ :^)

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