mom boobs

Haha, we’ll see how many weirdo hits I get from Google with the word boobs in the title.

Let me preface this by saying that for those of you who don’t know, I have 3 sisters. Out of the 4 of us girls, only 2 got hit with the boobie stick.

I was not one of them.

In grade school, I stuffed my bra. In junior high, I shoved as many of those paper thin bathing suit pads into my bathing suit tops as I could fit. In high school I discovered the super duper padded bras that stand up on their own and I never looked back. And right now, mommyhood has blessed me with the biggest boobies I think my body can hold while still being upright and functioning and I’m still blown away. So yes, they get their own blog post because I don’t know how long they’ll be sticking around and I’ll miss them when they’re gone.

So anywho, this weekend, 7 1/2 weeks post baby, I will be:

1. going to my first Cubs game of the season, and

2. going up to the lake in WI

And what do these two things have to do with my enormous mom boobs, you ask? Let’s start with the game. Despite the fact that I get stuck behind the tallest person at the park every time…

…I still absolutely love going. Only this time, I actually have to worry about my boobies, something I’ve never done before at a baseball game. I will be away from baby for no less than 6 hours which means that while baby is with Nanna happily eating from a bottle, my boobies will be getting uncomfortable. Which leads me to my first question…do you really know what’s going on in the car next to you when you’re driving?


Boobies are what’s going on. Some breast pumps actually have car adapters! I laughed when I first found that out and I’m sure I made some comment along the lines of, “why would you ever need to pump in the car?” Well, I’m officially answering my own question on the way to and from the game this weekend. Now let’s just hope that I don’t spill on my favorite Cubs shirt that used to fit me like a cute little T and now will have to be pulled across my chest like a twin sized fitted sheet being stretched over a king sized mattress.

2. This weekend will also mark the first day of my post-baby body coming out of hiding – I’ll be putting on my first bathing suit since my body looked like this:

And this morning I tried on every last bathing suit I have in my drawer (which is a lot considering I became a little obsessed with online bathing suit shopping before my wedding in St. Thomas), and I’m happy to report that I don’t think I’ll be offending anyone. Um, unless of course humongous mom boobies are offensive, in which case…

I’m really sorry.

At least now I don’t have to worry about my triangle tops traveling around to my back or slowly meeting on the string in the middle without me knowing.

Yep, huge ass ginormous mom boobs. Never did I think I’d write a post about them but I’ve come to realize that to have ’em is to know ’em is to love ’em.



Filed under craziness, ridiculousness

9 responses to “mom boobs

  1. I hate to sound like Debbie Downer over here – but enjoy those mom boobs. I miss mine. Because the results after you stop breast feeding? Not exactly awesome.

  2. Whooyeah! Boobs! (Ill give you some of mine. I dont want them anymore!)

  3. You are so funny! Enjoy the boobs while you’ve got them!

    Although you may want to consider some tape under your bikini tops…coming from someone who has always had boobs, you don’t want to bend over too far and have one slip out!

  4. Natalie

    You are so cute! My sister was also hit with the boobie stick. Me, not so much. I hope to have mom boobs one day and when I do, I will wear them proudly!

  5. woohoo boobs! thanks summer!

  6. haha enjoy them and have fun at the game and at the lake!

  7. jen

    The size of the mom boobs is amazing! Whoa! Hope the pumping worked well for you – I went like 7 hours between pumping over the weekend and it wasn’t pretty! 🙂

  8. Pingback: still waitin’ | rabit stew

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