I’ve been curling my lashes for 20 years now and once bought an eyelash curler on clearance. I probably saved myself a whopping $2. And the first time I used my cheap find, I positioned it over my eyelashes, I squeezed, I counted to 5, and when I let go, instead of seeing a nice curled set of Snuffleupagus lashes fanning me through the mirror, my shiny new half-priced eyelash curler cut my eyelashes in half like a hot knife through a butter patty. Yep, saved myself two whole dollars and 8 weeks of having to curl my lashes because they were too short to fit in the curler.

Two mornings ago, I outdid myself. I learned that it doesn’t take a cheap curler to maim the lashes. With my properly functioning full-retail-priced curler in hand, I positioned it over my lashes the same way I do every single morning, I squeezed, I counted…1…2…3…


In the blink of an eye (ha, see what I did there? Oh yes, yes I did), my hand slipped and I literally ripped out half of my eyelashes in one fell swoop. From inside my head it sounded like a freaking zipper and it looked like a caterpillar was on my curler when I pulled it away.

I can now feel air on my eyeball and it’s weeeeeeeeird.



Filed under Beauty, craziness, Makeup

9 responses to “zzzzzzzzzip!

  1. oh no, I’ so sorry! Have you figured out how long it will take to grow back?

  2. Kelly

    Ohh No! Well, hopefully they grow back soon! I love your eyebrows btw..Your should give a tutorial on how to do good brows 🙂

  3. Creen - Colleen

    Wha?? That could happen!!??

  4. owwwww… I swear my eye twitched when i read this.

  5. Owwwww…………just……….owwwwwww…………earlier I stabbed myself in the eye with my mascara (not the brush, but the mascara tube itself) and it still didn’t hurt as bad as this phantom pain that has been induced.

  6. memory

    Just did that exact same thing! Did it grow back?? Please tell me it grew back!

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